CIRCUS OF STARS

I am a dyed in the wool geek, and one of the things I enjoy doing is heading out to various geek conventions, such as DragonCon (which I've attended nearly every year since '97), Wonderfest (here in Louisville), Mid-Ohio-Con, San Diego Comic Con, etc. It's a fun way to find stuff you've been searching for, and generally immerse yourself in an environment that nurtures your bad impulses for a weekend or so.

And while I'm at these cons, I always look to the "Walk of Fame" in the event that there may be a current or former celeb that I'm interested in meeting!

Now don't get me wrong. I'm not one of these people who thinks that they're going to meet one of their idols and share some sort of important moment that you'll both treasure forever. I am not quite that delusional.

This leads me to the Freight Elevator Digression:
A few years ago at Dragoncon, 2001 I believe, I was in line for Anthony "C-3P0" Daniels. I'm not the biggest Star Wars geek in the world, but I do love the old flicks, and I have an original "Empire Strikes Back" one-sheet that I like to get signed when I'm at cons if there are SW people around.

Now, Anthony Daniels is pleasant but impersonal, and I can appreciate that. He used to wear a plastic robot suit and priss around the desert, and now millions of dorks wearing "Jedi Do it With Force!" t-shirts want to bend his ear until it falls off. I don't begrudge the man his efficient set-up: stand in line, pay the money guy, say hello, get a picture signed, take a picture, and you're out!

So, I got him to sign my ESB poster, had a picture taken with him, and moved along.
But before I could leave the line, a man approached AD, cutting through the line behind him.
"Mr. Daniels! Hello!"
AD smiles in a noncommittal way, and probably says hello as he looks through the man and attempts to return to making money for writing his name on paper.

"We met a couple of years ago! We had a conversation by the freight elevator!"
AD essentially cuts him off there, says yes, thanks, and leaves. The man is clearly sad that AD doesn't remember him.
You see, the man will never forget that day he talked to AD at the freight elevator. He no doubt has told all of his friends, if he has any, all about the time he and AD shared a good conversation, and really CONNECTED.

He will never forget it.
Now, Anthony Daniels, on the other hand, had forgotten the conversation as soon as it had concluded. In fact, it's likely that he was forgetting it as it was happening to him.

And that's FINE. That's good!

Celebrities, of any degree, are just people. Meeting them can be a lot of fun, and it's neat to get a memento of the moment. Sometimes they actually DO want to talk to you, and will chew your ear off until the next person walks up. And some are just polite and efficient, and never bother to register your face or name.

And that's great.

Either way, enjoy the moment, get your souvenir, and maybe later say to your friend "Hey, Chewbacca is an ok guy!" It's a nice story to have, but you don't have to polish it up with your fantasies that some day you're going to share an apartment Coosin Larry/Balki style, ok?

So, I do think it's fun to meet people who have done work that I've enjoyed, get a chance to say "Hey, that was a cool flick, good job!" I usually get an autograph, say thanks, and try to get a picture. It's cool when the people in question are really nice and talkative, but I don't take it personally when they're curt. They've been dealing with freaks like me all day long, and I understand that.

SO, HERE, you can view the pics of all of the sorta-celebs I've encountered over the years. And maybe some day this blog will really take off and I'll become famous and you can tell your friends about the time I completely blew you off at the freight elevator.
Dragoncon '97 was my first convention or any kind, and I was not prepared. I found myself wandering around the hall when suddenly there was an announcement: Julie Newmar was signing autographs!

I practically fainted, and ran to find her. You see, as a young Bat-geek, Julie Newmar all but singlehandedly (heh) ushered me into adolescence. She is the eternal Catwoman. Julie Newmar IS SEX.

So I could hardly believe (heh...again) that she was going to be there.

I stood in line and met her, got an autograph and got this picture. It is just about the happiest I've ever been in my life. I think I managed to escape without embarrassing myself too much, and as this picture proves: JULIE NEWMAR TOUCHED ME!!!!

It was a cool November night when Joe Strummer & The Mescaleroes came to Bogart's in Cinci. Joe Strummer has been one of my lyrical heroes since I was a young teenager. The Clash remain my favorite band, and I've always held that Joe was one of the most underrated lyricists in rock history. I even wrote a big paper for it in my high school English class (and got an A+, naturally.)

Of course, I'd never been able to see the Clash, so it was a dream come true when my friend Dan and I got to see him. He played some great stuff off of the Mescaleroes records (which you should own) as well as several Clash favorites.

Afterwards we waited around backstage, and eventually made our way in. Joe was absolutely one of the nicest, coolest guys you could hope to meet. We only stuck around for about 5 or 10 minutes, but I still got this autograph and the picture, and was able to tell my hero to his face how much I enjoyed his music. It was so awesome, and I'm absolutely heartbroken that he's gone.

! Might as well put Cassandra Petersen in there alongside Julie Newmar as one of the, uh, instrumental female figures in my puberty-crazed brain. She had been a late addition to the DragonCon roster (also 2001) and so I didn't have any of my stuff with me. Still got an auto'd photo and this pic. Again: ELVIRA TOUCHED ME! And, I'm not sure how old she is, but she's still super hot, and even hotter without all of the Elvira drag on. Then again, I have redhead sickness.
Known to me as Billy Bibbit in "One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest", Dr. Gediman in "Alien: Resurrection" and of course the voice of Chucky in the "Child's Play" flicks; at the time this picture was taken the LOTR movies were yet to be released. Now Brad is enjoying a resurgence of popularity thanks to his turn as Grima Wormtongue, and it's well deserved! Totally nice guy!
George Romero was visiting L-ville and stopped by the annual Wonderfest, which is mostly a model-kit convention (the world's largest, I believe) but in recent years has also expanded to become a general sci-fi/fantasy/horror con as well.

Anyway, I waited in line a couple of hours to get my "Dawn of the Dead" poster signed, but it was worth it! George is a personal hero, having directed the infinitely-aped "Living Dead" trilogy, "Martin", "The Crazies", and several other great flicks.
I paid, I got my poster signed, he took the pic with me. It all happened like clockwork, and I didn't mention a freight elevator.
VERY nice guy, signed the ReAnimator 8x10 for me as well as my "The Frighteners" poster, which he signed in HUUUUGE black letters, including "You're invading my territorial bubble!" Was a very gracious, cool guy.
I was as surprised as anyone when Louisville made the list of cities that the Kids in the Hall live show was being performed in. The show was hilarious, well worth the wait. Afterwards the guys all came outside and signed and took pics and talked to fans for what must have been hours, which is very cool. Scott was nice, Mark was nice, Bruce was pleasant but not overly talkative, and Dave Foley was VERY nice and friendly. Kevin actually ran out of the theater, jumped in a van and sped away waving a Canadian flag without giving any autographs. Perhaps he was ill? Eh? I had them all sign my KITH show poster, as well as take these pics. Very cool!
A big part of my initial DragonCon education was informed by "live action anime girl" Apollo Smile. A singer/dancer/voiceover actress, Apollo Smile started out small but came to be a major attraction at the con. She's also adorable and very nice. When I sent her an article I wrote for "Burt the Cat" (a local indie newspaper) she sent me a bunch of cool stuff in the mail, for free.
B-movie queen, pin-up model, former wife of Dave "Rocketeer" Stevens, Brinke is a cool gal!
Cynthia is one of the most beautiful and, uh, endowed ladies to ever appear in the classic Playboy mags (39DD!). PmotM Dec' 68, she was also an actress in "Beyond the Valley of the Dolls". There's something slightly strange about paying someone to sign nude pics of themselves taken 30 some-odd years ago...but I don't care. She was very sweet, the pics were super hot (ask nice and I may post 'em sometime) and she still looks good to me!
I was never much of a Gwar fan, but it's hard to pass up their live show when it's included as part of the Con. However, one year Slymenstra Hymen brought her Girlie Freak show, which included a geek-act, Ula the Painproof Rubber Girl, and many other things. But nothing could top the finale, when Slymie sits on a Tesla coil and shoots lightning bolts out of her fingertips!!! It is one of the craziest things I have ever seen, and as such, I swear eternal devotion to this crazy, lightning-shooting woman. All hail! (This pic was take on the day when I was going for a fat John Waters look. Did it work?)